UK Blu-Ray release from Severin Films and out now!
Plot: When the birds inexplicably begin to attack human beings, Rod (Bagh) and Natalie (Moore) run for their lives.
Oh sweet Satan, I have seen Hell and it’s name is Birdemic – Shock and Terror. For about the last month this film has sat on our screener list here at UK Horror Scene like the last kid to be picked in gym class and foolishly I decided to burden myself with Birdemic. I’ve watched some low-budget schlock over the years, I’ve enjoyed some of it too. I can tolerate a bad film better than most other people so I thought why not. I used to think there was no regret I could have that would warrant travelling through time to undo the past. Then I watched Birdemic.
I can’t really tell if writer/director James Nguyen is the ultimate sadist or masochist. The sadism is clear if you have watched Birdemic, it’s just painful to watch. Nguyen’s possible masochism however is evident in the fact that he spent four years making Birdemic and struggled to get it seen by a wider audience. In this era of Sharknados, B-movies are as popular as ever but Birdemic isn’t a fun film. There’s very little to laugh at in this film. The one joke that it has is that it is god awful.
From the beginning it is terrible. It opens to a mind-numbingly long credits reel, making sure that the people who made this film (and the fictional cast members that Nyugen just made up) got their credit seen before the audience turned off the movie. It’s an impressive feat to make a film come across as terrible before you’ve even seen the main character. Once Rod has been introduced and his love interest Natalie, the film really starts to become an arduous task. The characters are ridiculous, but in the most boring way possible. The film also makes every scene unwatchable with terrible audio, nonsensical camera movements and editing that baffles the mind.
The first half of the film follows the blossoming of Rod and Natalie’s relationship with it’s awkward dialogue and scenes that seem to build up to nothing before jumping onto the next scene. Rod’s character has little going on, he loves Natalie, his job makes an obscene amount of money, and he’s very concerned about the environment. We know this fact because he comes up with random lines like “good thing my car is a hybrid”. Natalie has even less character, she loves Rod and she’s a model. They are frustratingly boring. The subtle as a brick references to the environment imply that the birdemic is a result of global warming. The film tells us we better cut back on our use of fossil fuels. You will be kill by birdemic if you don’t.
At exactly half way through the film, the birdemic begins. It is more awful than you could ever imagine. It could have been funny, seeing these terrible CGI eagles attacking the city, randomly dive bombing and exploding things and people. It could have been hilariously absurd. It just wasn’t, it was stupid and clichéd. The rest of the film is just repetition. The same eagle screech repeats over and over and it tears away at your psyche. The film introduces guns to liven things up but instead we get bad CGI muzzle flashes and the same animation of an eagle falling out of the sky. I see where it’s supposed to be funny, it’s bad and absurd but I can barely crack a smile and the eagle screeching begins again and I swear at the TV.
One hour and thirty three minutes of one joke, the joke being “look at the mess I’ve made.” It’s a mess of a film and it only seeks to irritate the audience. This is a troll film, a “I bet you can’t watch this” film, a YouTube reaction video waiting to happen. The only reaction it gets is boredom though, as you endure it in hopes that something interesting might happen. The acting is reminiscent of the storyline porn set-up, awkward and terrible but somewhat essential to set up a little context but unfortunately Birdemic doesn’t contain any hardcore porn scenes to make up for it’s terrible storyline.
Don’t watch this film, it’s just boring and tedious. I’m not sure if we do zero out of ten ratings here on UK Horror Scene so I’m giving it 1/10. If you’re going to watch this, I suggest a drinking game, drink every time this film is still running, you win when you black out from drinking and don’t have to watch Birdemic anymore.
Audio Commentary with James Nguyen
Audio Commentary with Alan Bagh and Whitney Moore
Birdemic Experience Tour featurette
James Nguyen on Movie Close-Up
Moviehead: The James Nguyen Story teaser
Birdemic Experience 2010 trailer
Teaser Trailer & Theatrical Trailer
Electronic Press Kit