Dark Cove (2016) Review

rsz_dc1DARK COVE (2016)

Starring Rob Willey, Cameron Crosby and Rob Abbate

Directed by Rob Willey

Written by Dennis Willey and Rob Willey

Five friends go camping on the rugged coast of Vancouver Island, Canada. Things start to go seriously wrong while they party with two Australian surfers

There’s an argument in scriptwriting circles that you don’t necessarily need likeable characters in a film. Screw the save the cat moment, or even being relatable. Hell, most quality TV series now revolve around antihero’s. Because no matter whether the characters are likeable or relatable, there’s always two things the writers never forget to do: make them BELIEVABLE and INTERESTING. But what if you don’t make your characters likeable, relatable, believable or interesting? Well, you end up with something like Dark Cove.

rsz_dc2Five friends head out to the coast for some fun, including the Bromantic Bro Triangle of Joey (Rob Abbate), Donnie (Cameron Crosby) and Quinn (writer, director and editor Rob Willey), and friends Lacey (Jules Cotton) and Jen (Montanna McNalley). They expect a night of shrooms, beers and existential bro chats. And for about half the film, that’s what they get. Until they invite over a pair of Aussie and a Brit with the most bizarre accent I’ve heard in a very long time and a plot begins happening.

I wanted all of these characters to die. I was waiting patiently for a masked psycho or squealing inbred to wipe these fuckers out…but they never turned up. They just let this bunch come out with more inane, juvenile dialogue and play footy, play the guitar and talk about life and shit round a campfire.

Once the dark stuff starts happening, the unbelievable behaviour simply becomes inexplicable. I won’t go into detail and spoil it for you but it’s pretty hilarious, as everyone’s acting kicks into overdrive and completely at odds with normal behaviour. It’s actually enjoyable for all the wrong reasons.

rsz_dc3Technically the film is pretty slick. Willey has an eye and cuts the film well, and aside from the most ridiculous axe attack sound effect, the sound is very professional.

Look, this is an admirably assembled bad film, but I can’t deny, it’s entertaining in a The Room kind of way. Its mercifully short and with a better script this cast and crew will make something great. As it stands, it’s campy schlock.

5/10